No doubt I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.
Our matriarch hen was outside my window trying to wake up everyone within earshot at sun-break. Today it made me especially angry because my son and his friend, who spent the night outside, promised me they would feed the chickens when they started cackling in the morning…they did not.
As everyone slept through the angry symphony in our backyard, I pulled on my robe and went down to feed the chickens. After the chickens were eating I climbed up into the playhouse to ask my son why he was ignoring the chickens after he promised to take care of them so I could sleep in.
I admit, I was not the best version of myself during this conversation and regrettably I dropped an F-bomb under my breath as I walked off 😦
Afterward, I fretted to myself. I was hit with concern, that when my son’s friend tells his family about Zachary’s crazy mom, his parents won’t judge me with grace.
It was 5:20 am, I was wide awake, full with disappointment in myself. I sat on a bale in the garden and prayed.
‘You’re fearfully and wonderfully made. You cannot hide from me.’
You have searched me, Lord, and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
(Psalm 139: 1-14)